“I try everything just to see if it is okay”

I try everything just to see if it is okay. I am 54, so everyone is like, ‘Okay, you have to wear this type of clothes. Very boring, just a gray sweater and large pants,’ which I like to wear. But today, I have painter pants, very dirty ones. They are white but with paint on it. I bought them in Brooklyn. I have big, big yellow wool socks. I have very big shoes. It’s freezing here in Paris, and I have a big man’s shirt with very, very big sleeves, like double [the length of] my arms, with a tiny vest and jacket. While I was walking in the street for coffee, two people came to me to say, ‘May I take a pic[ture] because I love your look.’ Maybe we need more people inventing themselves. I’m not ashamed at all to try things.
— Sophie Fontanel

I love this idea of aging more than any other: try everything. 

Source: http://www.vogue.com/13446528/sophie-fonta...

47.

When I was in my early 30s, I dog-sat for this rich couple that lived in Hinsdale. One time I got a call, a couple hours after they left town, from the husband, who asked me to please go outside and look for the diamond from his wife's wedding ring, which she thought she might have lost in the driveway. I did it, even though it seemed stupid. A single diamond in a sea of suburban asphalt! But it was a wedding ring, after all, and I couldn't blame them for caring about their gems. Plus they were serious people, so I did what I was told. I wandered around out there for a while, gazing at the ground, and I even looked in the garage, but I never found anything. I wonder if they did or, if they didn't, if they ever wondered whether I had.

- • ~ • -

On the zodialogical wine scale, according to Laura Jane Drinks Wine, the CAPRICORN is a "Puligny-Montrachet, brut Champagne (substantial, though subdued)." 

Of course. 

- • ~ • -

How do you feel about turning 47? my occasional lover, the identical twin of Mark Ruffalo, asks as he dusts behind the TV. I smile wistfully and toss a handful of diamonds into the air, not even caring where they land: Substantial, though subdued.

New theme show: Happy Endings

There is no better television show with which to spend long dark winter nights than Happy Endings, and I've seen every episode of season 2 at least 59 times (rounding up). It is fundamentally and simultaneously cozy, chummy, breezy, bright, smart, fast, and a little mean, all adjectives I relate to. I first binged on it when I was stuck in NYC, sick, over Christmas break in 2011, and it was a saving comfort during a time of sloth and sadness. At first I thought Penny was my favorite character, and she still is. Then I thought Jane was my favorite character, and she still is. Ditto Brad, who might really be my favorite character. It took me longer to warm up to Alex and Dave, although the Marilyn Monroe Halloween episode sold me on the former and the "Temple Grandin/It's Pat/You look like a Jonas Brother" tight perm put it in the bag for me and Dave. I appreciate a slow burn. And since Max cuddles with two stuffed bears signed by Mandy Patinkin ("He sat next to us at a game once"), it was a fait accompli.

And guess where it's set? That's right: in theme town. And look at how happy! ABC! is! about! its! clips! Just not happy enough to give it a fourth season, I guess.

Lesson learned: it's okay to go home again. Sometimes home is what you need.

New theme shoe: this loafer

The challenge: be a loafer girl, and not in a "my mom made me wear these saddle shoes" kind of way, which is how lives get ruined. The loafer below, while not inexpensive, is everything I ask for in a shoe in the year 2017: sleek, classic, no-nonsense, a little butch (I 100% believe men get better footwear, and I strenuously object), with a slight platform so at last I can lord it over others. And that thin stripe of brown leather stitching along the footbed is what separates the cow from the herd. FYI, challenge accepted!

Paul Green "Jonah Platform Oxford" @ Nordstorm

Paul Green "Jonah Platform Oxford" @ Nordstorm

New theme city: Chicago

I look at a city like I look at a marriage: Right? Okay, then. I'm ready. I'm ready now.

cf: To change your life, learn how to trust your future self:

Like a worker assembling a gift basket, the brain’s subconscious reward circuitry computes the collective value of all the different benefits that will accrue tomorrow, and the day after that, and the day after that, and ties them all together in a package. Even if the future benefits may seem distant and hence hold little value, they collectively can add up to something greater than a single moment of pleasure in the here and now. The mountain will always remain larger than the tree.

New theme aesthetic: Annette Bening

What the fuck is a theme aesthetic? Who knows! Who cares!? Not this free bird.

Have you seen 20th Century Women yet? If not, wait no more—it is weirdly delightful and well worth your time. My favorite things about it were, in uncertain order, Billy Crudup, Annette Bening, Greta Gerwig, the kid who plays the kid, and the Fanning sister. In short, I loved everybody. Whether or not you will love it depends on how you react to this description, from a recent New Yorker profile of writer/director Mike Mills: "The film’s only adult male is William, an earnest mechanic who makes his own shampoo." For me that's solid cinematic goddamn gold, and Billy Crudup sells it like a sad, befuddled champ. (The profile itself is notable for every line spoken by Mills' wife, Miranda July, but especially this part: "Much as July loves her husband’s work, she remains mystified by the gap between his actual childhood—“You could hug Mike for a long time, and it wouldn’t be enough”—and these glowing portraits. “It’s almost what you would do in some spiritual practice,” she said. “A devotion to an absence.” How clearly do you need to be able to see and describe a person to come up with a reading like that? I was also struck by this, from director Joachim Trier, because it describes another of my favorite visual/tonal/philosophical vibes: “There’s a Todd Rundgren-ness to Mike’s work, a Steely Dan coolness, the melancholy low light of a late California afternoon in Laurel Canyon.”)

Anyway, Annette Bening is my new theme aesthetic, is what this post is supposed to be about. Obviously I've had a lot of coffee this morning. But look at how gorgeous and comfortable and chill she is, all fully adult glamour without being at all fussy: