Seeking doppelgänger

I've spent the past two work days interviewing people for my job. My boss asked if I would and I'm happy to help her out, but there's a weird out-of-body element to it, given that it's a job I love and was hoping not to leave. But that horse already hopped the Greyhound and bought a one-way ticket out of town, as they say, and it was my choice to follow the heartlight back to Illinois (ahem please view this album art).

But forget all that nonsense, the question is: how do I replace myself? What would I want in a new me? Fewer em dashes, I suppose. Fewer exclamation points. Excessive punctuation and byzantine run-on sentences—ornate, opaque—are my stock in trade and I'd hate to see anyone try to replicate that. Otherwise it's just a job, man. Everybody's replaceable. Except Mark Ruffalo. And Benji. Oops! Spoke too soon.

+ fyi: Google tells me use of the word "byzantine" peaked in either 1958 or 1963, depending on your ability to interpret a trendline/your level of caring. So. 

+ free tip: "Case Insensitive" would be a good blog name, if I were looking for good blog names (don't worry, I am not). For the record, previous names of this very blog include: The Lunchtime Chronicles, Litwit, Lovegoose (?), and Casual Heap. I sure hope Next Kari is better at naming things!

+ p.s. someone called me “Karl” last week, more than once, in a multi-email exchange. I didn’t bother correcting them because I don't care all that much. What would be the point?